= SAD. It's been 15 days now, but it seems like yesterday. I still haven't been able to go home and sleep in my own bed. I'm with my sisters in Dad's home. We are each other's support, thankfully. Memories flow through me every minute... all of them good. I find myself thinking, "Oh, I need to tell Dad" when something off the wall happens, which is often in my world... but I can't. We had Nam flashbacks together. We rocked the nugget to Kris Kristofferson and Hoyt Axton... and Creedence, et al. I think about how sick he was, and how he fought with all his might to stay with us as long as he could. And I know... he's not suffering anymore. I know this. No need to tell me he's in a "better place"... but I appreciate the notion??? Life is surreal right now, to say the least. One day at a time. I cherish everything he left behind. I cherish his memory. I cherish his legacy... he was quite loved by many, you know. He was the missing link to my personality. I feel real bad for the "people" who didn't get a chance to hang out with him. YOUR loss.
Dad always had my back. ALWAYS. Sometimes we disagreed. Sometimes we would bicker. But we ALWAYS told each other, "I Love You" when saying goodbye... in person and on the phone. E-mail, texts, etc. EVERY time. For 40 years. I still can't believe he's not coming back... My heart has NEVER felt this much pain. NEVER. Oh, and it's been through a lot. I'm thankful I have TRUE friends at this time. This is me bearing public displays of emotion... you got me.
The end.
"TRUE friends" are just that... not pretend friends.
"People" You know who you are.
Hey Real Friend. I've got your back too. Your Dad was one of a kind and so amazing..who can forget Mel's Bday dinner in NYC after 9.11- he alwaya made me smile with his funny little FB notes. You will see him in the clouds the sun the stars and he is watching over you. I told my 7.5 year old Niece Gabby about your Dad and she said to tell you not to worry that your Daddy was now in heaven with your Daddy. I am here 24/7!! love and miss you!
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